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Wednesday, 29 December 2010

Revised version of "When I'm Cleaning Windows..."

Nothing to do with Microslosh either. The original song was sung by George Formby, a 'singer' with a rather strange high pitched nasal voice and a strong Lancastrian accent, very popular in the 1930s and 40s. I have always considered him an unlikely pop-star and I guess his voice and the ukelele he strummed are acquired tastes. That said, Darryl Ashton has provided me with this rather amusing 'alternative' version which fits a more recent 'star' to disgrace our nation and TV screens - none other than the Prime Minister who thought he was the next President of Europe. Mind you he also thought he was the President of the UK...

President Blair has been spotted doing impressions with his Ukulele of George Formby's; "When I'm cleaning windows," in the Bahamas.

Lay-deez and Genn-ul-men, it goes something like this.

(Feel free to sing along)

Now I go taking freebies,
To save a tidy sum,
With Cherie and the kiddies
And Endora, her fooking mum.

We stay at least a fortnight,
We always eat our fill,
We swim, surf and sunbathe,
But we never see a Bill.

We had to ban the papers,
It simply isn't right,
For them to print those pictures,
Of Cherie's cellulite.

She's still a handsome woman,
She's big on Human Rights,
And back in our cabana,
It's five times every night.

We like to take our freebies,
On the Caribbean sea,
But if Cliff's got other guests,
We'll go to Italy.

The cares of office melt away
When the sun is on your back,
And when i'm taking freebies,
I'm a long way from Iraq.

I know the bombs in London Town,
Give you the Heebie - Jeebies,
But i'm well out the firing line,
When I'm taking freebies.

There's nothing like Barbados air,
When you're living like a millionaire,
Miles away from Connaught Square,
When i'm taking freebies.

In my profession I work hard,
I have to take a break.
So why should you expect me,
To pay the going rate!

BY

DARRYL ASHTON

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